Good times and Goodbyes

Bear with me if this gets lengthy.

The last two weeks have been extremely hard but extremely joyful. I've learned that no matter how at peace I am with leaving my loved ones for at least 14 months, I can't do goodbyes. I have cried a lot and it's not always because I am sad I will miss out on these peoples lives while in Peru, but because I am just now truly coming to understand the love these people have for me. It can't be easy for DJ to always have his big sister running off on some adventure whether its to Tulsa for school, Colorado for the summer, or Peru for mission. My parents are letting there little girl go into the real world. Scary for any parent, however, my "real world" is not in a city with a job, but a foreign country among the poor. This love has brought me peace and has brought a different meaning to my life and the relationships I have in it.

As I was driving across the Midwest with my friend Beth, I also came to realize how much my friends are my family. I am having a really difficult time leaving them, especially since most of them are starting new adventures too that I want to be present for at all times. Whether it's planning a wedding, joining a religious order, doing mission work in Chicago, continuing in seminary, starting a job, going to grad school, I want to be there. I tell people to please write me and keep me updated. Even if I'm unable to reply quickly, I want to know what's going home. I'm sure when I leave Peru, I'll ask my friends there to do the same. This hit me especially at Abigail and Tim's wedding in July and especially yesterday at my sending forth mass. I was surrounded by people who have seen me at my best and happiest and at my saddest and my worst. Yet they love me and were there to celebrate the Eucharist and send me off to Peru. This was all emphasized by the fact that the sending forth mass was celebrated by Fr. Matt who has been with me the last 3 years and has helped grow and mature in my faith, answer my questions, and be a friend to me. It was at the Newman Center (Catholic student center) at TU. My home. I walked into the chapel yesterday and felt like I was at home. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, even to places. I was flooded with memories of sitting with Liz on the left hand side with some other Thetas and a few Chi Os and Lambda Chis when I first started going to mass again, and of sitting in the front with my brothers and sisters from Newman. I could keep going on about the Newman Center, but I'll get moving.

I finally have my visa! Praise God that adventure is over. The consulate was closed Friday when I tried to go get it (Peruvian 4th of July) so Marcel and I drove from Tulsa to Chicago Sunday night, got to the consulate, was there for 3 hours and, after a few more obstacles, frustrations, and a few tears, the Consul General gave me my visa. We booked it out of that city and I don't ever plan on going back except for a Cards Cubs game in Wrigley. That's it.

Even after having my visa, it isn't really hitting me that I'm leaving. It's like I'm saying goodbye but I don't know where I am going. I have no picture in my head of my home or new community. I can't even fathom what the Andes look like, what the food will be like. The only thing that keeps making its way into my head, is that in less than a week, my whole world will be in Spanish. YIKES! I've been practicing, but I feel I'll still be a fish outta water come Monday.

This week I am hanging out in Tulsa and not really thinking of leaving. I am doing my best to fit all of my friends in, if I don't give you a proper goodbye, I'm sorry, this week is crazy busy, I'm surprised I've had time to write this entry. Know that I love you and will be praying for you. I leave Sunday at 1030 am. My mom is coming to Tulsa and taking me to the airport (probably no the best way for us to leave each other but I couldn't imagine anyone else taking me) and I fly to Miami then Lima. Altogether it is about 8 hours in a plane so not too bad.

Thank you for the support. Next update most likely will be from the southern hemisphere where it's winter (not like Iowa thank God!).